Breathe

There are so many people in my life that i care about and love that are  right now struggling…struggling with depression, anger, betrayal, pain, and loss......this life can be such a painful journey......  I hate that life can be that way….yet it is sometimes the very thing that refines us……as I was wanting to encourage some of these people in my life today I was going to the word and asking for the creators take on all this......below are a few things I found as encouragement......and below that my "meanderings"  i thought possibly there are some of you that are struggling today to......take heart in your creator.....he has covered it  all for you.......he deeply desires a relationship with you.  one that will sustain and grow you in ways you never could imagine....the road isn't easy.....i won't lie......but it is one worth taking!  

I was reading today……Proverbs 15:9 The Lord hates what evil people do, but he loves those who do what is right.  

“Perhaps the wound is old.  A parent abused you.  A teacher slighted you.  A mate betrayed you……and your angry.  Or perhaps the wound is fresh.  The friend who owes you money just drove by in a new car.  The boss who hired you with promises of promotions has forgotten how to pronounce your name….and you are hurt.  Part of you is broken, and the other part is bitter.  Part of you wants to cry, and part of you wants to fight….there is a fire burning in your heart.  it’s the fire of anger…..and you are left with a decision, Do I put the fire out or heat it up?  Do I get over it or get even?  Do I release it or resent it?  Do I let my hurts heal, or do I let hurt trun into hate?….Unfaithfulness is wrong.  Revenge is bad.  But the worst part of all its that, without forgiveness, bitterness is all that is left…….” 

 (from the applause of heaven)

Psalm 30:11 You took away my clothes of sadness, and clothed me in happiness. 

“the first step to joy is a plea for help, an acknowledgment of moral destitution , an admission of inward paucity.  Those who taste God’s presence have declared spiritual bankruptcy and are aware of their spiritual crisis.  Their cupboards are bare.  Their pockets are empty.  Their options are gone.  They have long since stopped demanding justice; they are pleading for mercy….they ask God to do for them what they  can’t do without him.  They have seen how holy /god is and how sinful they are and have agreed with Jesus’ statement “salvation is impossible.” ….Oh the irony of /god’s delight --born in the parched soil of destitution rather than the fertile ground of enrichment.  It’s a different path, a path we’re not accustomed to taking.  We don’t often declare our impotence.  Admission of failure is not usually admission into joy.  Complete confession is not commonly followed by total pardon.  But then again, God has never been governed by what is common.”  

(from the applause of heaven)

1 peter 5:10 He called you to share in his glory in christ, a glory that will continue forever. 

“ to believe we ar totally and eternally debt free is seldom easy.  Even if we’ve stood before the throne and heard it from the king himself, we still doubt.  As a result, many are forgiven only a little, not because the grace of the king is little but because the faith of the sinner is small.  God is willing to forgive all,  He’s willing to wipe the slate completely clean.  He guides us to a pool of mercy and invites us to bathe.  Some plunge in, but others just touch the surface.  They leave feeling unforgiven….where the grace fo God is missed, bitterness is born.  But where the grace of god is embraced, forgiveness flourishes….the more we immerse ourselves in grace, the more likely we are to give grace.” 

(from the grip of grace)

Patsy Clairmont says…” the valley views are so restrictive, which is why we think we’ll never find our way out, but the lessons are plentiful and tend to go deep into our souls.  that’s the thing about valleys;  they usually are fertile with truth.  I’ve found that most of us initially respond to the valleys the same way.  We say to ourselves, if I ever get out of here, I’ll never come back to this place again.”  and even thought we may end up paying a return visit, each time we do we learn more….more about who we are, what we are made of, and how we relate to others.  Of course, what we do with what we learn often determines the value of our own counsel.  In the book of Nehemiah a valley verse caught my eye.  Actually it was a phrase; “the priests, the men of the valley carried out repairs” ( neh.  3:22) I wonder if folks in that day referred to them as “the men of the valley.”  they were priests, god’s called men.  And they found them selves in a low place.  And surel it was a down time since their city was in ruins, their people scattered, and they had been relegated to valley living.  It doesn’t seem to matter if we are priest or pagan, rich or poor, male of female, young or old, valley times come to us all. And I think sometimes we who treasure our faith are  joltd because we think somehow our beliefs will deflect hard times.  In truth, moany of god;s people have lived some of their most vital years, while making their greatest contributions to others, while in deep valleys.  Priests and peasants included.  Our hearts are especially consoled when someone volunteers to go into the valley with us the essence of giving comfort…..is never to abandon the person --to keep showing up, no matter what!……………….when christs disciples joined him on a mountaintop, they wantedt o build booths and remain there )luke 9:33) who wouldn’t?  the views were magnificent, and the company divine.  But jesus led them back down the mountain to the valley where they would WALK out there faith.  That true for us too.  We may visit spiritual mountaintops, but more than likely, we will live out most of our existence in the lesson laden valleys.  The valleys of grueling work, disappointing people, financial reversals, devious enemies, untimely (from our perspective) deaths, and physical maladies, which seem to be part of our ongoing existence if not education on this dusty planet.  No wonder folks sing with such gusto, “ one bright morning…..I’ll fly away.”………………………….................... “ valley life is demanding, which is why I’m not surprised to find in the book of Nehemiah our valley men, the priests, involved in the repair work.  This tells me we had better roll up the sleeves of our faith and be ready and willing to enter even the valley with a strong work ethic… as with nehemiahs people whether or not we are called on to mix the mortar ,, hang the door, or spit polish the tower, lets go forth and do so with all our hearts, minds, and strength.  For lowly work often leads to lifted spirits……………………………I heard and old song sung many years ago by a southern pastor and his wife, who at the time were in the valley of rejection.  “I’ve got one more valley, one more hill, maybe one more trial, one more tear, one more curve in the road, maybe one more mile to go, I’ll lay down my heavy load when I get home,” …..remember, until  you arrive home, valleys have rich soil from the mountain runoff; valleys are where the flower flourish and the trees bear fruit.  And valleys cause mountaintop views to be that much more breathtaking.  So be cheered, for “he restores my (our) soul.”

 I hope this encourages you today. I dont' pretend to have all the answers…..all I can do is to share my journey and the things the Lord has and is teaching and refining in me….so here is some reflections and a few tidbits from where I am at….maybe there will be a sliver of truth and wisdom  you can glean from or identify with……..

My life is soooo not where I thought I would be even just 10 years ago…….definitely not where I saw myself 20 years ago……most the dreams and aspirations of that 20, 30, something have gone……but god has replaced in me a desire for what he wants…….and that is a very different role than I may have seen for myself.  Of course there are still days when my human fleshly desires, dreams want to supercede what is……but I lean not on my understanding and let go….b/c if I didn’t I think I would plunge into a sea of despair……not because my life is sooo awful but because I am so sinful and left to my own would want what I want and be very self focused……or/other focused ( as in keeping up)…….that is sin nature.  WE fight it everyday.  I am learning day by day that life is so much more than success, money, retirement, health, ease, relaxation……and more about Love, serving, relationships, provision, today, perseverance, and true rest……to name a few.  Unless god chooses, we will not be wealthy, we may never attain a bigger or better house, we may not even attain a savings let alone retirement fund, I may not wear mall clothing or wash my hair in salon shampoo or adorn my face with trendy products.  But god has allowed us to survive thru amazing defeating situations…..he has sustained lives when they could’ve been lost, he has given sanity and clarity where I thought there was no hope, I have never went with out food, ( it may not be organic or fun) but we are fed and often feed many others…..( I have the 20 pounds to prove it J)  I have children and grandchildren in our lives that have been pulled from the fire and given new hope and new beginnings……I have endured sleep deprevation, unending pain……marital dismay, disappointment in others and myself…loss of relationships and friendships……betrayal….…financial setbacks, job changes-making huge income changes, yet seeing god allow us to live abundantly on much much less….and allowing our family to be happier and have more meaningful time to work out our relationships….and opportunity to  walk out our faith.  he has reconciled many relationships, healed our hearts from betrayal….he is still teaching me what it means to be content, be committed, be God focused, family focused, other focused……..to still care for myself…….yet not let it consume me…..to have a fulfilling relationship with my creator…….to savor every moment….no matter how small or insignificant…….I am learning to take it as it comes (well….most the time) …..to let go of what can wait…….to pray, read, rest, hold that hand, wipe that tear, read that book to a grandchild, or take that walk……I am behind most of the time…….and often have the fringes of complete overwhelmant overtaking my being…….my hormones are a three ring circus……..and many things I wish would change have not…….so…..I give myself room to breath…….let things go I never would’ve, take the time to talk to a friend instead of cleaning or scheduling or obsessing……take time to pray over catching up on the news…….or planning a “big meal” take a walk with scott over folding laundry……I am still struggling with saying no…….but I am working on that!

As i said this is just a snippet of where I am……..and where I have been…….there is so much that is knit into the fabric of our lives, intertwined in our legacy and heritage……so much of what happens before we are 18 I think is grafted onto our root……we may never be able to rid our root of it but we can keep it pruned……choose different fertilizer………and encourage growth in a different direction…….personalities give different color and growth…….so each of us cope and work thru things differently…….keep walking out your faith……..try to allow yourself to feel your feelings …(god gave you those feelings and he has felt them too) ……just be cautious to not sin in them…….it isn’t always easy……let go of what you can……….it is a process……….and when all else fails ground yourself to your bedroom!!!  I seriously have to do that sometimes either because I am not fit for human consumption…..or I seriously have lost my grip and am way in over my head and need to force myself to rest…….I pray today that no matter who you are or where you are at....that you may have peace, and joy, and rest, contentment with life and the simple things…..spring is such a good time to remind ourselves of that!  and......don't forget to.....

Breathe..........